Tomorrow
By Dana Van Wie
He wandered among the skeletons of discarded vehicles searching for the right resting place for his bundle. Darkness nipped at his heels as if saying to stay focused and finish job at hand. It had been raining off and on all day, reflecting his mood; cold and alone. Now the frigid rain ran down his neck to his back chilling his very being. The salvage yard was empty at this hour except for the ghosts of the past that haunted the cars and the two guard dogs that he had romanced each night for the last three months. It had been easy because he had always had a way with animals. The Shepards knew him well and waited with anticipation for the treats he would bring. They were never disappointed, tonight being no exception. They gravitated to him like bees to honey. Tonight the dogs seemed to be on edge as if they were picking up on his uneasiness.
The man was not quite sure how he got to this moment, but in truth he did know. She was what he knew, what he was familiar with. Victoria had been like his mother controlling, angry but beautiful. Her beauty was so contrary to what was inside. There must be truth in the phrase: “Beauty is only skin deep.” She proved that. She had been everything that he was not. His features were not remarkable. His hair was a brown, but what would you compare it to? Probably wood bark, that dull mousy brown. Victoria had that wild vibrant auburn hair. His license stated that his eyes were hazel, very nondescript compared to her vivid blue ones. He guessed that the reason for her choosing him was that there was no competition. He would be there along the edges of her world to be pulled in as she desired.
Looking around him, he felt he knew how these cars would feel if they could. They were used and discarded. Parts picked from them for someone else’s use. The cars hid behind the fence of the salvage yard where no one had to look at them. That was how he felt with her, yet he had said “Yes.” when she wanted to marry him. Who wouldn’t with a beauty like that? He had not known that her motive was to acquire a puppet, a househusband, a money tree. After a time, he had objected to the frivolous ways their money was piddled away but he shrank back to his assigned role. Victoria's words ripping away what little backbone he possessed. For six long years this had gone on. She tore at him with her scorn and contempt. All of these virulent outbursts were followed by apologies and that smile. The smile was like brilliant beam that gave him hope she really did love him.
There were times she made him feel loved and an actual man, in the bedroom. This was the only place that he had seemed to have any kind of virtue to her. After wild passionate coupling, Victoria would lay curled up long side him purring and stroking his chest. These moments made everything worthwhile. As time passed, the smiles came less frequently as did their glorious moments in each other’s arms.
His bundle had been getting heavy when he spotted what he was looking for. The car called to him like a beacon gleaming with its dazzling red color. The trunk, open in a bored yawn, was the perfect confines for his bundle. The Jaguar XK crouched there, in its seeming perfection, as if ready to bolt at any second. The problem was that this was impossible. The front end was a tangle of mangled steel. Its sleek emblem hung from the mounting, just barely hanging on. He dropped the parcel in the depths of the trunk then stepped back. This car seemed so like his wife, a large predator cat. He stared at the hanging jaguar ornament and without thinking marched up then jerked it from the mount. His arm went back and with a violent swing, the cat flew through the night air. There was no seeing where it landed but he heard the smashing of the windshield. The sound had a satisfying feeling to it. The dogs just sat there with their heads slightly cocked in question of the strange behavior. He suddenly felt so very tired and old beyond his years. Slowly the man trudged back to the trunk peering into the darkness.
Words tumbled from his lips, "You have no power over me anymore." He felt no pleasure in this.
The response came back, "Are you sure?"
The man looked around. There were only the dogs looking at him as if he were someone to be pitied. It had only been his guilt questioning him. To fight it he thought back on her last rant. It had all started because of the cordless drill he bought for a mere eighty bucks.
"What the hell is this?"
"I needed a drill to fix the towel rail."
"You can't use the electric one you have? No! You used money I need for Vegas."
"I'll make sure you have enough, Darling."
"Right! I'm leaving in six days, you idiot. You don't get paid for another nine."
Victoria's eyes narrowed, "Have you been holding out? Have you been stashing cash away?"
He looked away, "This is from the two hours overtime I had worked. I thought you knew that."
"I'm so sick of you and your "I need to fix this." and your "We need to pay that."", she mimicked. "I don't care what you think or need. I'll tell you if you can get a god damn tool or not." Without warning, she slapped him across the face. "That is to remind you who runs this house, you sniveling slug." Turning around, she sashayed out of the room.
All the tirades had become too much. Precious rays from the outside world had started to filter into his dark murky one. He had begun to wonder if there was something better than being trapped in the little box that she kept him in. Thoughts of breaking free had crept into his mind like leprechauns offering treasures. The fear of the repercussions had made him nauseous but the glimpses of freedom had kept calling to him. Finally, the answer came when he had entered the salvage yard. That was a place that secrets could be hidden and tucked away where no one would ever find them. With a slam the trunk was closed and his secret was trapped in its confines. The next day the car would be crushed and a new life would begin.
